This dramatically increases the chances that your child will grow up emotionally intact. What's damaging for your kid is feeling abandoned by the other parent.Just keep telling yourself that kids need both their parents. And that happens to so many children whose fathers don't have much visitation time with them.Give them cell phones so they can have a relationship with each parent that isn't mediated by the other. If your ex is destroying that relationship, there is nothing you can do about that.
Try to resolve the financial issues quickly and move on.
That might mean shared custody, or it might mean that the kids live with one parent but see the other parent very often.
The top risk factors for kids when parents divorce are: You may not be marital partners, but you will always be child-raising partners.
Keep reaffirming this to yourself every time you get mad at your ex.
Tell them that you both did your best to save the marriage and that the decision to live apart was made by both people. If your child has seen you fighting, you can refer to that.